Maybe I'll Join the Circus.

23 days. 12 hours. 50 minutes.
I am a college graduate in 23 days, 12 hours, and 50 minutes.
COLLEGE freaking GRAD! Awesome right? Yeah, way awesome.

Except for the fact that I have 1,000,000 zero plans come 23 days, 12 hours, and 50 minutes. If you ask anyone I've talked to in the past week, they will tell you that I am freaking out. I mean, I've always been the girl with a plan. And a stellar plan, if I might add.

And now nothing. Nada. Zipadeedooda zilch. Panic mode. Can you tell? But...this blog post isn't just about me freaking out. It's about a break through.

Let me rewind a little bit. I've always known that I'm going to be okay. I know that I'm not going to whither or instantaneously combust because I don't have a plan right now. There are worse things that I could be dealing with, and I am grateful to live such a wonderful life. I'm okay. I do know that.

I think the reason I'm in this baby ridiculous panic mode is because it feels like everyone else and their pet hedgehog, Dexter, has a plan.

I have the same conversation every day.
Insanely nice person, "Oh, Jenna! You're graduating! That's exciting. What are you going to do next?"
Me (wearing my sassy pants), "I DON'T KNOW!!!!!! Join a convent, or the circus. Travel to Antarctica."

Okay, maybe I don't entirely yell at them in caps lock. And I'm never serious about any of those options. But it seriously is the same everyday. I. Do. Not. Know. efff. 

Here is the breakthrough portion. Today I stumbled upon a blog called The Unlost, and I found a post entitled, "Why It's OK to be Lost and Confused." Man did it come at the right time! This girl, Therese is brilliant. She wrote about how it's okay to not have it all figured out. In fact, more than okay. Which I think I know, but coming from a complete stranger, who doesn't know me, was real.

And when I say real, I mean like John Mayer talent real. Not like Taylor Swift..."real."

The jist of her story: 1. same sitch   2. realized it was OK   3. went and did remarkable things anyways.
So...breakthrough. Ask me what I'm doing after graduation. Really ask me. I still don't know.

But my reply this time (without the sassy pants), "I have no idea. But whatever it is, it's going to be remarkable!"


And if you have any suggestions on what remarkable might be for me, I am taking them openly. Bring on the love.